19th July 2010

Yeah!!! Its some minutes past 9pm and I'm feeling good. Its actually night...I mean its dark outside. It was also dark outside this morning when I woke up some minutes past 4am...getting ready for work, one mind on what I'm going to put on...another mind wondering how the day would go.

The journey to work was tormenting becos today was here...today that I had been pushing away unconsciously...

how do I go to work and work/walk with crutches

I was tormented with the thought sha...fine gal like me. What would I tell the press? Why was God doing this to me? What sins I'm I paying for? Chei!!! My market don fall oooo....and its this period I have some correct new toasters...not one, not two...not three sef. What have I done to deserve this.

But you know, its really not about the sins we are paying for...as a matter of fact sometimes God is silent becos he knows the end from the beginning. Maybe there is a lesson here for me to learn....maybe now I would appreciate even the smallest part of my body...or the most useless part e.g finger nail. Or maybe he is trying to teach me humility. Maybe its all for His name to be glorified.

SO I got down from the car...wobbled a bit (I'm still learning how to use the thing) and as I took a step towards my office I said a prayer:

Jesus...its me and you now, please help me. You could have prevented Daniel from going into the Lion's den, but you did not...You were there with him. You allowed those men go into the fiery furnace when you could have prevented that from happening, but you didn't...instead you were there with them. Now I'm here...I need you to be here with me,help me on this journey, help me as I go step by step...take away shame...take away embarrassment, see me thru with my head and chin held high. Please Lord I need you to help me thru this. Amen''


And it was fine after that...I answered all the uncomfortable questions and it was okay...I did my work, even as I went about the office, leaning on the crutches... it was fine. The day began...and the day ended. And It was fine.

So I guess what I'm saying is that, God doesn't always prevent people from going through the fire or tough times or sad times... but His grace is sufficient to see us thru unscathed (besides the true test of gold is fire abi?). If we can only stop looking for the end of the story...and leave that for God, we will be surprised just how far we can go. Let Go....and Let God.




Soon I'll be jumping up and down again...very soon. In the meantime....I'm good.


Tomorrow is another day...

Good Night.




N'J