Single In The City

There is a reason its termed Singles Awareness Day (even though I now hear that is now celebrated on the 15th). Valentines day have an uncanny ability to make singles feel depressed and lonely and sour. Today 14th of February is that day of the year were most of you single chicks will look longingly as your girlfriends rush out the door clad in red with stars in her eyes clinging to her date, and wish that were you as you echo the words ''have fun ooo''... or you sit down listening to your girlfriend moan and whine about how confused she is...she doesnt know if she should spend the day with "Man A' or 'Man B' and is wondering why 'Man C' is still calling her....and you secretly wish that you had at least one person...you are not asking for too much oooo...just one person to spend the day with.

Well my dear, leave that thing o, you can choose to be happily single or sadly single on this day. One very simple and popular thing you can do today is THROW YOURSELF A PARTY!! Better yet Host a Single's Party. I mean what exactly is the big deal? If you dont have a partner, pining and wishful thinking wont bring you a partner the next day. Yes everyone is hooked up...but so bladdy what? TODAY you have been given a good reason for a party and you wanna waste it carrying a long face around? The thing is...happiness, doesnt rest in the bossom of the opposite sex, neither does it exist only on valentines day. You can choose to be sad and lonely and listen to songs like 'everybody hates me no body likes me, i'm gonna eat cockroach' or you can show yourself some love, I mean I love myself so much that I can actually mail myself a valentine's gift and still act surprised when it arrives..lol...az in 'wow Nutty just sent Jay a gift'

I look back with fond and not-too-fond memories of my past valentines' days...

2005: I had an awesome time with 'Angel' who had come visiting from his school bearing gifts.

2006: Spent it in Abuja with same boyfriend

2007: Spent it alone bcos 'Angel' and I had broken up and the relationship between 'PB' and I was'nt strong yet. So it was me...brandy...and some weed...with other single chicks. School life was fun/terrible. No gifts except from toasters

2008: I had travelled to ABJ to spend 13th-20th with 'Honey'... and I ended up spending most of that time in the bathroom with a cigarette between my lips and tears flowing like River Benue. Twas a terrible experience. I was the only one who gave gifts on this occassion...none from him.

2009: Spent it in church...in fact it was one of the best i've had so far. I will single....by choice that period.Was taking a break.

2010: Spent it with my current ex boyfriend who showed up by 6pm after we had agreed I should make Valentine's lunch that sunday (which we didnt eat again cos he was ina rush)...who came empty handed cos he said he didnt know what to get me...and who acted like a complete jerk....

2011: hmmmm...well for the first time in a while I actually wish I could just throw a party for myself and by myself. No such luck. Had a dinner date last night at Jades Palace and got a Black Berry and Italian sandals as gifts from A friend who I still dont know if I should date...today I'm having another date after work and gym with another friendI'll talk about later....

Bottom line... having a partner for Valentine's Day isnt a guarantee for happiness. If you are not hooked up this season...then make today a day you can remember with fond memories. Make it count... you dont have to be in love before you show yourself some love.




''If you mistakenly buy into the myth that you need a partner to be happy, being single can be lonely at times. However, if you view this time as an opportunity to work on yourself, appreciate what you already have, and make a plan to be an even better you, just imagine the kind of partner you will be attracting into your life—thanks, in part, to being single on Valentine's day.'' Rhonda Rabow M.A.


Happy Vals Day y'all...be happy today.












o le ku....tell me something when I no fit do...

Application for the position of 'Friend'

I thought someone stole my writing Mojo until a deeper search revealed that the reasons my words are stuck is because at a subconscious level I keep thinking there is more to life than my inconsequential tirade now and then. I mean people are more concerned this season about Jega and the ongoing voters registration as well as Egypt’s revolution and the possibility of Nigeria doing same soon, and these are the things matured minds want to read about…right?

I’m equally bothered about the above issues, eh en...but every man with watin dey pain am…and one of the things disturbing me is the fact that I can’t seem to make female friends. I never gave this a thought before because I was quite comfortable being a guys girl…but one cool Saturday I scrolled through my phone, for what I can’t remember, and noticed that the only female friends (not hi, hello type of friends) are friends I’ve had since secondary school, just three of them…(who by the way are based in warri, thus far from me) and only one female friend I made when I relocated to Lagos in 2008. So 2008-2009-2010-2011…almost 4 yrs and I made only one female friend? Its eerie somehow, don’t you think?

It never bothered me till now…I mean I’m always hanging out…and the fact that I hang out with guys alone never registered in my head till that Saturday. So I’m forced to ask…what the heck is wrong with me? Have I been cold towards my fellow ladies, or have they been the one brushing me off…if so why? Watin I do them?

Long story short…last month I made up my mind to put in extra efforts to get female friends…my target was to get a friend every two months, thus by December I’ll have made six (6) friends. That journey started last month and so far all I’ve gotten were polite brush offs…azz in I just don’t gerrit…women are very difficult people I swear.Its hard to please them. I say hi…I compliment the two I have eyes on now…I even send an sms here and there, but do I get a favourable response? No… I’m I making progress? No…Are they taking this as seriously as I am? No…this is February and I haven’t made half a female friend not to talk of one…

‘have you paused to think for a moment that these chicks you want to make your friend, just doesn’t want to be friends with you? or can your ego not process that?’ asked iboze, one of my online sarcastic witch of a male friend.

Its crossed my mind…but so does it cross the minds of guys who woo girls that just don’t give them the time of the day, do they give up? No…most of the time don’t they still get the girls? YES…eh en..so shall I get them.

But in case you have tips on how to make the process faster…please I’m your home girl ooo, give me tips ooo. Truth be told I’ll rather be content with my online female friends… but sometimes…I need to hang out offline with chicks too…and have ladies night out or in, and go shopping...these I can’t do with my virtual friends and I can’t continue to hang out with guys only. I long for girly things sometimes too.

Help me tell these chicks to stop fronting for me o before I slap sense into their head

And I’ll appreciate any help I can get on how to go about achieving this goal. Thank you in advance....mwuah mwuah mwuah