Friday, November 11, 2011

Good Bye My Lover.... Good Bye My Friend

Its not laziness... its not for lack of something to blog about... its not distraction. My new laptop is going to take all the blame for my not blogging as much as I want to. As beautiful as it is with very authentic keyboard and lovely feel, I just cant seem to connect with it... the idea of switching it on and using it for more than 30mins  is something I don't look forward to. I guess we haven't bonded yet.

So what is this thing I am about to talk about? I'll tell you.... my ex boyfriend, one of my ex boyfriend told me this morning that he proposed to his girlfriend and that she said 'YES'.... for some reasons that has gotten me upset since morning. His email...which was a reply to my email, because we keep steadily in touch... came in today by 9:15am...and since then I haven't stopped cooking. I made a one week full pot of Vegetable soup with beef, kpomo, stock fish and croaker fish....after that I made a two weeks pot of chicken stew, after that I made Jollof Rice...and the house help had to beg me to stop when I told her to go to the market to get me ingredients to fry chin-chin. 

Cooking is not my favourite thing... but its what I do when I'm upset. Either that or cleaning. How can my Angel  be planning on marrying next year. We broke up in 2006... but we have been friends since then, he's one of my best friends, my ace. We talk about everything and gossip everyone, and when he started dating this chick in UK early this year, I thought it was just to get over his last where did all this proposal/marriage thing come from now? 

I'm happy for him, not because he will soon be getting married, hell no, seriously that is one man I don't want marrying anyone...that is anyone except me (or at least till I'm married)...No I'm happy for him because he sounds extremely happy, happier than he has been for a while. And he deserves to be happy because he lives his life making others happy. But I cant shake the feeling that I am losing my friend to a stranger... there's this pain at the bottom of my stomach that sends me to the bathroom every time I think of it. I cant tell anyone this because they would think its ridiculous and laugh me to death... its been five years come on. Thus I'm blogging about it.

Something I reluctantly learned from this, this morning was that I can fully move on now... I realised that I've never ever completely given anyone else 100% of my love and heart and always left an escape door open in every relationship I have been in the last 5 years...because there has always been a tiny weeny part of me which hoped...and wished that despite everything in our past that made us part ways, we may one day get back together. Well there goes my that. 

I need to stop here... re-reading what I'm writing makes me want to go to the bathroom again.

Oh yeah, I got a Honda CRV car on saturday of last week... I'm yet to pimp it. 

I'm still searching for a job while still going for physio. I should maybe think seriously of starting my own business...but what?

If you dont know Joxy  then you are missing alot. She's a great blogger and has been a great friend to me... besides she likes cooking, so much that I've never met anyone except my mum who enjoys the act of cooking like she does. 

I love you all

Nutty J


  1. Hey Nutty J, here's my tuppence. Your ex broke up with his girlfriend after four years of dating, and in the space of about a year, has proposed to someone else? Hmmm. God will do your own for you, let him go. And even though you are friends, maybe it's time to let that particular friendship go too. There's no point in holding on to something or someone who's only going to cause you pain. Now on to happier things. Congratulations on your car :), and yes, starting your own business sounds like a great idea. Thanks for the shout out, and keep your chin up xx.

  2. Congrats on your car!!! How do you feel now, healthwise?
    As for Angel,,,will like you said, time to move on

  3. Yay on your car! will move on, don't worry.

  4. Don't worry, it wasn't meant to be for a reason.


  5. Awwwwww...

    Time will heal but you consciously have to move on as is time dear. hugs

    congrats on ur new car and i hope u get a job soon!

    Hope you feeling better healthwise.

  6. It's hard to let that very special person go,even when you break up with them.I'm glad that you've decided to let him go,it's the right thing to do.Having said that,you really should give love a chance (i mean another love,not his).There certainly is a guy out there who'd make you forget about him.Congrats on your new car,Honda CRV is a good car,although i have a personal beef with it.

  7. Yay about the car. Happy rocking!

    He wasnt for you dear. No matter how much you willed...but one thing is for sure, yours is coming. And when he comes, he wont give you a hard time nor waste your time. :) Believe!!

  8. @ All; Thank you very much for your comments... I've digested all the advise.

    You guys rock


  9. Damn girl, cooking when you're upset? If we were friends, i'll make u mad just so u can cook and i can eat it :)
    i guess it's natural to be a little upset, maybe even a tad jealous of his wifey.. but you'll be fine *hugs*

  10. I just read the part of getting laid off from your job, sad to hear about that. Congratulations with the when upset, I can like to come visit you only when you are upset oh, free food... :D.

  11. Congrats congrats!! but pls if u feel this way abt this guy.....better slip into your jeans and go get your man back! Yes NONYE said it!


Say it as you mean it... I can take it