The Art of Complaining

Com-plain
[kuh m-pleyn]

1.      To express dissatisfaction, pain, uneasiness, censure, resentment, or grief; find fault
2.      To tell of one’s pains, ailments etc

That’s the dictionary meaning of COMPLAIN

Other words for ‘COMPLAIN’ include but are not limited to:

Bemoan, bewail, crap, find fault, fuss, grumble, lament, nag, moan, and whine, whimper etc.

Some people have got a Master’s degree and currently are studying for a PhD in Complaining.  It’s so sad that they are not even aware of this habit in themselves.
There are two ways in which people get into the terrible habit of complaining over everything, relevant or irrelevant:

-        Hereditary:  I’m sure you all can understand that a child would take after his mother and/or father. If you were unlucky to have parents who complain about everything ranging from the price of bread, to the amount of tax being paid, to the choice of soap or the rudeness of their colleague then there is an 80% chance that you will also be a whiner.

-        Victim Mentality:  This is a state of mind where you believe that everything and everyone is out to get you. You moan about people not treating you right, you moan about your friends not calling you like you call them, you complain about your boss over working you, you complain about being sick and no one is there for you, you complain about not having a boyfriend/girlfriend, you complain about having a boyfriend/girlfriend who doesn’t understand you, you complain about your family, you complain about your hair dresser, you complain about the pastor’s sermon… you complain about your ex boyfriend, in your opinion they all want something from you in exchange for nothing. Even your mobile phone’s ringtone is sad ‘whatever my lot thou hath taught me to say it is well it is well with my soul’…

What you are is a very SAD person and you may not know this, but you are spreading your negativity to those around you…that is why people avoid you. They use you because they know you need a reason to complain later, so why not? They can’t stand being around you for long because all you do is talk about your trials and woes real or imagined. They won’t invite you to social meetings because all you do is sit there and find something wrong with the people there. You lose your real friends one after the other because when they say:

‘Hello dear…how are you?’ you reply with
‘ I’m okay…this life no easy at all, can you imagine what happened yesterday blab a bla’

People begin to find visiting you or calling you exhausting…it’s like trying to walk through a train wreck….very annoying and exhausting. So it’s easier to just avoid you, because guess what??? You are not the only one with issues. Because your friend has chosen not to voice hes’/hers’ out doesn’t mean she doesn’t wet her pillows with tears at night. But how would you know when all she does is listen to you rant and rave every time.
How do you get out of this bad habit? It’s simple…

-         GET OVER YOURSELF!!! The world does not revolve around you. No body, not your parents, not your friends, not your enemy, no one owes you anything. Life is per head. Because you do good doesn’t mean those around you are under any obligation to do you good in return. Stop expecting people to be good/kind to you because you look good or work hard or do well. Stop expecting anything from anyone… you are in control of only yourself and your actions.

-        GET A LIFE!!! Another reason you complain so much is because probably outside your work and your house you have nothing else going for you so you do not understand how or why others seem so content and happy without you or your presence in their life. Get busy…join a club, volunteer at a foundation, go fishing, go partying. Get your own life and stop studying other people’s short comings and concentrate on your own life.

-        GET A VOICE: If you feel you are being given the short end of the stick…speak up. There is no point ranting and raving to your friends and family for something someone else has done to you. What are they going to do about it for you? If you are sick and you feel you don’t deserve it, tell it to GOD. If your boss is over using you and short paying you…speak up and tell your boss. If your family treats you like crap…speak up and tell them. If a particular friend mistreats you, tell those friends. It’s simple
I’m sure you are not aware of this, but there are some people who have REAL PROBLEMS. How you decide to define ‘real problem’ would actually be based on how broad or narrow minded you are, but please repeat after me ‘SOME PEOPLE HAVE REAL PROBLEMS’… say it aloud…say it one more time. Good.  Now you know. There are people in places dying of starvation, people who are in prison without trial for something they were accused wrongly of, people who are dying of AIDS, Women dying of Breast Cancer. You have good health…you have shelter, you have food, you have friends and family (you are pushing away), you are not in prison…why don’t you count your blessings and stop boring people with things they can’t change for you.

Summary

Before you start complaining, pause and ask yourself:
a)      Is this worth complaining about or I’m I just looking for sympathy/pity? (that’s pathetic)
b)      Will whining to him/her solve the problem….will she/he give me an answer I don’t already know
c)      Am I medically stupid? Must I talk about myself all the time?

Answer these questions honestly each time you feel like whining and you’ll be on your way to becoming a person others want to associate with. You can thank me later….

Quote:  Any idiot can complain, it takes someone with brains to do something about it.



Nutty J